I had been hospitalized for less than 24 hours, had not eaten in over 24 hours, and my breakfast had just arrived when I was whisked off for a “swallow study”. The staff watched an x-ray video while I swallowed various liquids, declared me NPO, and sent me on my way. It was not a “swallow study.” It was a swallow test and I flunked miserably.
Staff told me NPO means “nothing by mouth,” but no one could say what the initials NPO stood for. Google knew…“nils per os,” Latin for “nothing by mouth”.
I love food. I love to cook, eat, try new recipes, and watch food-related shows. I take joy in preparing a meal to share with family and friends. Taking away the pleasure of eating is cruel and at that moment, the worst news I could have heard. Who made this decision? What right do they have to eliminate this love from my life? Why did I tell anyone I was having difficulty swallowing?
When I returned to my room a neon pink sign with my name and NPO printed on it hung on the door (so much for HIPAA). My breakfast was gone, and I wondered how I would recover from the loss of my lifelong love.
The emotional pain of being NPO paled in comparison to the physical pain to come. Nourishment needed to come through a tube, and since the doctors thought my swallowing issues were temporary, they inserted a nasogastric (NG) tube. An NG tube is inserted through your nose and into your stomach. Despite what the doctors may say, the insertion process hurts a lot, first when the tube is inserted and again when they clip it in place. I am convinced that when the resident says you may experience “some discomfort” it really means “this is the first time I have done this and it is going to hurt like hell.”
Nourishment through the tube consisted of a brown liquid delivered via a pump from 4:00 PM to 4:00 AM. The pump’s alarms sound regularly and the “brown slush” (as I called it) gave me diarrhea and messed up my glucose levels. Despite the neon pink sign, I was constantly asked by staff if I wanted something to eat.
During my follow-up neurology appointment, my neurologist said the hospital doctors were too optimistic about my status and scheduled surgery to insert a percutaneous endoscopic gastronomy (PEG) tube. A PEG tube is surgically inserted through your abdomen into your stomach. More comfortable than an NG tube, and I looked better without a tube hanging from my nose but still requires nourishment delivered for 12 hours via a pump.
Ironically, my surgery fell on Halloween and I am still being fed through a tube.